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January 10th, 2009


03:22 pm - ENOUGH
as soon as I know you all the way inside, every pulse and so forth such
vascillation at the touch
until I’m in your microvascular system, every vein
or in that nervous system place
forever running messages along that one tiny fingersized chord
keeping body and brain in harmony
resonating human sung vibrations
cut me open call me meat
or lover!
all serious or all smiles
all alligators and crocodiles
all true, real, real.
enough.

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August 9th, 2007


11:12 pm - happiness and bedtime
the loud voice or the giant beast
quiets me and says GO TO SLEEP

why is our home so dark in the day,
and how did it get to be that way?

i am exhausted, but i don't ever want to sleep.

goodnight.
Current Music: ooooh lordy

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July 22nd, 2007


10:40 pm - talk to no one
Knock knock.

(only crickets. Crickets moved in.)

knock knock.

(shhh, listen. Pots and pans? Scrambling for the door? No, just crickets and quiet)

knock knock.

(Who’s there?)

Heart.

(Heart Who?)

HEART ATTACK!
Current Mood: sadsad
Current Music: boohoo-hoo

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July 7th, 2007


12:47 am - haiku generation
i present what's
really on my very
perplexed mind in words

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July 4th, 2007


10:54 pm - Brinks. Eras.
More brinks of more eras. Welcome to the launch of Teaching Year Part 2. Tomorrow morning. Bedtime in two minutes but in the meantime, JOURNAL!

The end of a self-destructive Summer Part A recedes into a productive self-constructive Summer Part B. The heat is on, and I am like a small smile drawn on a Shrinky Dink, expanding to become wide and real while baked in the oven. Real global oven.

I am missing some people from college- film professors and teacher assistants among others. Sometimes I wish I had taken my film major seriously. Or any part of college seriously for that matter. Now there is real life that remains, and the great thing is I get to take it seriously. Or maybe I don't- maybe that's the mistake? Taking it too seriously? Or self too seriously? There's the mistake.

I really wanted to do this musical theater improv thing in Long Beach but I can't find improv actors. Okay, lie. I haven't pursued it really, I'm sure there are people interested. I'm busy but I want it to happen.

Eventually.

For now, I teach.

Goodnight

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June 8th, 2007


12:35 pm - Musical Improv Show at The Found Theater
Exciting News. I Need You.
I am about to be musical director of a burgeoning musical improv show at The Found Theater in Long Beach. I need improvisers, and I need them now. It's not a musical improv games show- it's long form, with a structure. This theater is in a GREAT location, and this is an exciting opportunity to get some musical improv magic happening in Long Beach. We'll start with once-a-week rehearsals (probably two weeks from now) and then go from there.
Email me for more info. itsartastic@hotmail.com
(xposted in livenudepeople)

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May 28th, 2007


04:49 pm - Yamahoohaha
I have a multithousand dollar keyboard and lots of recording equipment and I still don't want to do anything but use Garageband and play Kurzweil. My little improvs inspire me. This Yamahooha thing does NOT inspire me, it intimidates me. Lots of rhythms and sounds, but not-a-one that strikes my heartstrings the way a good old-fashioned piano sound does. I think I might return it. Is that giving up? I told myself I should learn how to work this contraption. It'd be nice to know how to play with samples on this machine. But is that where my interest lies? In other news, I submitted something to http://www.learningtoloveyoumore.com/. It's not up there yet, but when it is... can you find it?
Current Music: Don't Dream It's Over

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May 8th, 2007


02:35 am - Merry Christmas
Twis the night before Christmas*, and all through the house
Two creatures are stirring. They are cats.
What with hot sticky air and invisible bugs
Cannot get to sleep, I drink tea from a mug
Awakened by slow jams and loud men who yell
And the screen from the bed-a-room window just fell
Things are falling apart just as things come together
Morning birds chirping in summer night weather
Too hot and too cold, an uncomfortable night
But tomorrow, tomorrow! The end is in sight
Counting minutes awake, need to get to sleep fast.
My first year of teaching, behind me at last!



*figurative Christmas. Christmas of the end of my first year teaching. Tomorrow. Or, today. Today in a few hours. Three hours to be exact, I need to be up and ready to go. Booooo nonsleep. (It rarely happens, but when it does, rhyming is my remedy to insomnia.)
Current Music: MEOW!

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April 29th, 2007


01:04 am - Like a Tiger Defying the Laws of Gravity
In an attempt to not take things so seriously, I come again to LiveJournal. I'm trying to stir up some brainstew. I have been shaking my empty head for the last few days, and lately the only thing substantial has been my subconscious.
I am done with teaching in 7 days. Finishing my inquiry project tomorrow- or that's the plan.

I saw "Freedom Writers" and "Human Nature."
Kaufman refined the quirk in his later films.

I have been in a mood lately and I want out. I want to tell a story that isn't mine.

I am glad I'm here, and I'm glad I'm here. It feels good to think in specifics, not in abstractions. Moving away from nebulous thoughts and feelings.

(C'mon mood shifts, shift back to good again.)

I thought of the time I went to the pet store to buy cat claw clippers and I ended up buying a cat bowtie. I also bought a leash and asked if I needed a harness to walk my cat. The checkout man remarked that it is "kind of odd" to walk a cat. We stared at each other in silence. I bought the leash.

My cats won't wear the bowtie.
Current Mood: gratefulgrateful
Current Music: Of Montreal

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April 15th, 2007


09:49 pm - Current Obsessions
* Cat Neck Puff
* Eating Tremendous Amounts of Food
* Unstuffing my Nose
* Two Weeks Left of School
* Rescrambling my Brain
* Composing for Clarinet
* And, as Always, the Future
* LAST.FM

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